TEDx Speaker, Divorce Strategist & Campaigner
TEDx December 2019
Suzy Miller Divorce Strategist™
“The Peace Delusion
In The War Of Divorce”
– for full TEDx see https://youtu.be/fXCzlobVmpo
Thank you Suzy Miller for an
Loved it Suzy Miller. You have incredible stage presence. (Yasmin Sheikh)
I loved your story and the way you delivered it. I’ve happily never had the awful experience of going through a divorce but if I ever do, I’d definitely want to do it your way! 😍 (Reesha Armstead)
Loved listening to your story today Suzy Miller (Lisa King)
Your story was awesome and how you told it was amazing! (Su Patel)
I actually got goosbumps when you spoke
Everyone – Employees, Parents, Society – needs to know how to play their part in creating world peace:
Every family nurtures the next generation. Have you ever wondered why we struggle to create Peace in the world? Have you thought that just maybe, we need to find ways to create Peace at home first?
The cost of family separation to the economy is staggering – and the cost to our children’s future abilities to form stable relationships and flourish within society, is even greater.
This is not a talk about how to stay married. This is a road map for how families can change form peacefully – and how we can all help them. In fact, what we learn first, is how we are currently making the situation worse without realising it. It’s time to wake up.
Did you know the UK and Scotland currently both have a Shadow Minister for Peace – with no Ministry of Peace to inhabit it?
On the world stage, the conservative estimate of the cost of violence is $1,988 per person. Over the last decade, GDP growth has been seven times higher among countries that improved in peace when compared to countries that deteriorated in peace.
But how can we believe world peace is possible, if we can’t even divorce without starting a war?
My talk focuses on what the divorce lawyers don’t tell you that can explain why we are at war with each other and our environment, the tools for peace that most people don’t know exist, and why I believe we should create an actual Ministry Of Peace – and how to do it fast.
“I met Suzy at a public speaking training event, in a room of over 100 people she shone out like a beacon of hope. Her message is clear and benefits anyone who needs support information and guidance when it comes to families dealing with separation and divorce.
Her own positive experience of maintaining strong family bonds have afforded her own children and ex partner an opportunity to explore their own needs alongside the needs of the family as a unit.
To restore solid security is clearly the desired way forward for any family struggling with separation. She walks the talk as she shares her own wisdom and she helps you navigate the minefield (that may seem inevitable) of the split. With Suzy’s nurturing and clear guidance you discover it is absolutely possible for all members of any extended family to feel connected, to support and nurture each other with emotional intelligence and live harmoniously.”
My Family Is Not A Broken Family –
It’s An Extended Family
Suzy Miller is the UK’s unique ‘Alternative Divorce Guide’, A Divorce Strategist, Public Speaker and Trainer, featured on Radio 4 Women’s Hour, the Daily Mail and C5’s The Vanessa Show.
Suzy has collaborated with the Ministry Of Justice in helping to promote Dispute Resolution and educate couples on how to have a more peaceful divorce. She is the creator of the UK’s first Divorce Fair and campaigns for better ways to divorce.
You don’t need to see family as ‘broken’: You can help your friends, family and colleagues to evolve into an ‘extended’ family instead.
I am writing to thank you for the talk you gave last week. It was in turn funny, poignant and thought provoking.
It took great courage to share your story so openly and allow yourself to be vulnerable. Your talk quite literally gave me goose bumps.
Thank you for showing us an alternative way to approach divorce. It is greatly needed in the world.
With kind regards
Wellbeing Women’s Business Networking Group Sevenoaks April 2018
She Created Her Life Event Shoreditch April 2018
International Nanny Desk Conference Sept 2018
Best Way To Split Retreat Sept 2018
Association Of Nanny Agencies Nov 2018
Let me inspire your workforce
to know the simple information they need
to keep themselves and their colleagues
away from an unnecessarily stressful divorce
– and where to go for help (not just to lawyers!)
(Suzy Miller, Divorce Strategist, Public Speaker)
“Companies should intervene and help employees going through marital break ups to prevent them ‘crashing out’ of work and ending up on benefits, Iain Duncan Smith has said.” (The Telegraph 8 Nov 2014)
Family breakup and divorce has significant health consequences both physically and emotionally, and therefore it is vital that co-workers and managers have a basic understanding on how to deliver “First Aid” in the form of guidance, access to resources, and a non-judgemental approach.
Divorce-related stress is made far worse by the situation becoming adversarial, and the financial strains and sometimes separation from the children can lead to difficult behaviour, absenteeism and self destructive behaviour in employees who are affected.
Divorced men are twice as likely to attempt suicide than married men. In the UK, between 15,000 and 20,000 couples go to court to resolve child access disputes each year. In a survey by Mischon de Reya, one in five parents admitted their primary objective was to make the experience ‘as unpleasant as possible’ for their former spouse, even when they knew that this made things worse for their kids.
I deliver the talk in my role as the UK’s Alternative Divorce Guide: I collaborate with the Ministry of Justice in promoting mediation as the preferable route through divorce, and I write regularly on healthy co-parenting and better ways to divorce for national magazines, Huffington Post and the Daily Mail.
This Divorce First Aid for Employees talk is aimed at ALL EMPLOYEES!
The talk and also the resources are not aimed just at those who may themselves be dealing with divorce and family separation – but instead at the whole workforce, who are the ones who have to the deal with the consequences of other people’s divorces!
I believe that making this Divorce First Aid pack available to employees to share with their families will have a preventative effect. Those who access the coaching/counselling free intro sessions may end up not getting divorced at all, and those that do, will find a more amicable way to go through the process, or at least not get sucked in to their ex patner’s aggressive approach.
My objective is to take the fear out of talking about Divorce and family separation, and to inspire employees to offer healthy guidance to their fellow colleagues (and family and friends) that will keep their family-change out of the courts.
The talk I provide is humorous, packed with key information but mostly, it helps people to let go of the idea that a nasty divorce is ‘normal’, and inspires them to see better ways of navigating changes of family form.
The result is a reduction in stress-related absenteeism caused by family breakup and a more emotionally intelligent workforce.
“Suzy is able to engage the room with her interesting talks which are focussed towards the age group of her audience.
Her talks are very interactive and Suzy leaves the audience very informed with the topic of her discussion. “
Austin Chessell, Collaborative Family Solicitor, Accredited Child & Family Mediator at Feltons Solicitors & The Family Mediation Centre
Stress is now the number 1 reason for absenteeism at work
“The court made it clear that if an employee tells her employer she is suffering from stress and cannot cope, it is not an adequate response merely to tell her to seek counselling.” (Personnel Today 2008)
An employee from O2 was awarded in excess of £100.000 in compensation because she was too stressed in her work and the company did not take quick enough action. Duty of care must be demonstrated.
As part of the existing wellbeing provision that you offer your employees, at no charge to your company, you can add in something unique and valuable that I believe will have a significant impact on reducing the continuing rise in employee stress related absence and mental illness suffered by many companies in the UK.
Divorce impacts heavily on the workplace because it increases financial pressures, emotional turmoil, and absence rates in employees – and this impacts directly on the company’s bottom line.
Traditional EAPs are not always targeted at specific life crises like divorce and family breakup, and employees often do not access them because they need a private resource that is not under the auspices of their company.
Divorce First Aid Training for Employees
Temperature of their divorce too high?
How to help your work colleagues to avoid a nasty divorce.
Simple ways to help them to rebuild their confidence and where the best resources can be found.
Some of Suzy’s press and media coverage:
BBC Radio 4 Woman’s Hour 1 September 2014: Suzy Miller interviewed by Jane Garvey about staying friends with the Ex and his new wife. Click here to listen:
Daily Mail FeMail feature 20 August 2014: on Suzy Miller, written by Suzy Miller, about staying friends with the Ex. Read article here……
Huffington Post UK: Contributed to article 8 October 2014 “How To Regain Confidence After Divorce Like Beyoncé’s Mum, Tina Knowles”
BBC Radio Sussex & Surrey 22 April 2014: Expert comment from Alternative Divorce Guide Suzy Miller
Radio Croydon Sonia Thomas Show 6 April 2014: Special guest Suzy Miller Alternative Divorce Guide
BBC 3 Counties Radio: Expert comment from Alternative Divorce Guide Suzy Miller
Ect Magazine Jan 2014 Surrey and Horsham editions p84-85
Read the article here: (pdf download) ETC Magazine Jan 14
Blog Talk Radio: IV Suzy Miller
BBC Radio Sussex & Surrey 22 July 2013
BBC Radio Sussex & Surrey 2 April 2013
Bella Magazine 12 Feb 2013
The Ex-Best thing (staying friends with the Ex)
Reduce stress related absence and loss of productivity – at no cost:
We can provide Alternative Divorce First Aid stay-out-of-court resource packs to your employees at no charge to them or to your company.
If you would like to give your employees access to free 1-1 advice from legal, financial, debt, parenting and other experts (A Divorce First Aid Information Pack), then please contact Suzy@alternativedivorceguide.com.
The downloadable resource can include:
- A clear ‘to do’ list that deals with the basic practicalities of divorce and breakup
- Some key FAQs answered in plain English with links to further information
- RED ALERTS: common mistakes you will want to avoid
- Videos of ‘shared stories’ from others who have been on the same journey
The Information Pack also contains 5 Videos of common Divorce Myths – Busted!
- how to avoid adversarial lawyers
- how to protect your children (and yourselves!) from the toxic effects of a divorce turned nasty
- how to use this experience as a catalyst for amazing change
Our Mission: Through encouraging stay out of court divorce, we believe that a broken family can be changed into an extended family, and that the Alternative Divorce Guide First Aid Information Pack provides the information and the inspiration to make that possible.
“I can honestly say it is my lifeline, and has been for the last three weeks….”
Sam Wilson talking about Divorce in a Box – See the Video of Sam talking about how the Divorce in a Box product has revolutionized her experience of divorce Click Here
Contact Suzy Miller to arrange for your company to receive a voucher code allowing free access to the resources to your employees, or a bespoke resource pack created to suit your requirements: Suzy@AlternativeDivorceGuide.com
“Anger always involves projection of separation, which must ultimately be accepted as one’s own responsibility, rather than being blamed on others. Anger cannot occur uness you believe that you have been attacked, that your attack is justified in return, and that you are in no way responsible for it. Given these three wholly irractional premises, the equally irrational conclusion that a brother is worthy of attack rather than of love must follow. What can we accept from insane premises than an insane conclusion? The way to undo an insane conclusion is to consider the sanity of the premises on which it rests. You cannot be attacked, attack has no justification, and you are responsible for what you believe.” (A Course in Miracles Chapter 6 Introduction section 1)